>>Stop. Think. This place is full of Wierd Puzzle Shit, but it always works on some sort of twisted logic. If it says that the games are for 'lovers only' and that if you don't have one you 'may as well kill yourself', doesn't that mean that playing the games alone will kill you? Go find a partner. Preferably the human kind.
Let out a few creative swears, preferably while flipping off the sign and wishing that Marissa woman would call you just so you could give her a piece of your mind. Follow this up with a soothing smoke before checking out the other games.